It Took Me 50 Years To Understand Life

I can remember living so carefree as a child, a teenager, and into my 20’s. Somewhere in my 30’s, I lost the hold I had on living free and easy. It came at the tail end of a terrible marriage, and the stress it brought into my naturally easygoing way. It changed me. Life has a way to do that when you constantly put yourself in fight or flight. My wings felt clipped. My fight was exhausting me. Life had kicked my ass, but I vowed to be whole again. It took me 10 years to get past my past and renew my lease on life. I was ready to be me again. But as we all know, most things don’t go as planned.

Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans.
—John Lennon

Over the last two years, I have come to understand this much more clearly than I had for all the years leading up to it. Nothing will remind you of that fact more than the loss of loved ones, an unexpected diagnosis, or sudden illness. I experienced the trifecta. 2020 saw over two dozen loved ones leave their final mark. 2021 hasn’t been much better, including my mother’s diagnosis of late-stage recurring lung cancer, and my own battle with COVID, this past summer.

My understanding of mortality has been solidified and my desire to experience life each day has been resuscitated.

In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.
–Robert Frost

Waking up to a fresh new day is a privilege granted to you for an unguaranteed amount of time. The moments we waste on bullshit can never be replaced. In life, we all take one final step. We don’t usually know when that will be or where that last footprint will land. But it’s what ties each of us together to everyone else–it’s our universal inevitability.

Through it all, I was able to get past the obstacles placed in my way. My writing career had lost a bit of momentum but I kept at it and started my company, 300 South Media Group after seeing so many companies and individuals taking advantage of the naivety and excitement of indie authors hoping to have their words published. I needed them to know someone cared about their dreams more than stealing their money.

I am sure there will be other hurdles to deal with as I climb this mountain, but I vow to do the best I can every day I can. And I will be sure each step I take is done with purpose and the footprints will not soon be grown over or forgotten.